IN GLORY UNDIMMED

alice kushing.

It wasn't as lavish a life as Ada Wolff thought it would be when she began her career at eighteen with modeling. The Twiggy of German, an uproar of publicity overran the young woman's life and took her beneath the tide until she found herself drowning in its consumption. It was glamourous and fun, yes, but also filled with narcissistic sharks out to kill whatever crossed their paths. The lime light called for skinnier, prettier, younger and fresher. Caught in the rift of an eating disorder far beyond her control and a life no longer worth the addicting cash flow it brought in, Ada resigned from her modeling contracts at thirty and sold her career in order to move across seas. America felt like the fresh start, a country full of better future possibilities. Love at first purchase, Royce introduced himself and swept Ada off her feet with grand gestures of exquisite gifts set for the princess he promised she could be. Excited and enthralled by the idea of being financially supported without the work she used to have to give in return, Ada said I do a year into the relationship.

Royce always knew how to get what he wanted in life; from his German bride to the casino empire he built from the ground up, there was nothing he couldn't have if he truly desired it. Son of a business savvy New Yorker, all of the right moves were always made to ensure stability. By twenty five, Royce had managed to start his own project of opening a casino in Las Vegas, using the trust fund money his father had established for his son over the years. It was a big risk to take, but one that would only benefit him in the end. Ten years later, it would be in that very hotel that he would find himself bewitched by a vision of dark hair, long legs, and a face that had almost literally just come off the billboards.

Not even three months into his marriage to Ada, the newly married couple found themselves pregnant. Alice, after Royce's grandmother, was born August 27 with the same inky hair and exquisite features as her mother. Nothing but prideful words would be heard from the Kushing family. In love and full of adoration for their first child, nothing but the best was in store for the little girl. But overcome with untreated depression after giving birth, Ada slowly began to wither away both physically and mentally as the years passed. Old habits died hard and an eating disorder once more became an issue for the former model. This time she was unable to defeat it. By the early age of forty seven, Ada died from her untreated battle with food, weighing barely ninety five pounds on her death bed as a coffin of mere bones was slowly lifted down into a six foot grave.

Alice was merely twelve when she said goodbye to her mother. Tough as it would be on any child to lose a parent, it didn't quite faze the young girl in quite the painstaking way as her family members and friends would have assumed. Stoic in her emotions, she quietly grieved in her own manner of hiding behind superficial happiness, a quality she could have only directly inherited from her deceased mother. Hiding behind his business, Royce left his daughter at home in Boston to her various nannies while he found his escape from his dead wife through making money. It seemed like a perfectly fine setup for the duo; neither had to pretend to be pleasantly happy around one another nor did they have to fill the empty silence Ada once occupied.

Life wasn't completely terrible, though. Alice might have festered an unhealthy resentment toward Royce, but she was more than content to live off of his wealth. Filling her world with music and clothes, she'd grow up to find her love for expressing her feelings not through smiles and laughter, but through style and the beat of a song. With friends in high places throughout the world and a passion worth delving into, Alice took a shot at being a DJ; first for her closest friends at their parties and then expanding into the local club scene and being booked with larger and larger venues across the country. It began to take shape as a career option, but Alice knew she'd never feel complete with just music. Taking it upon herself to share her opinion on style, Kushion was opened - a small boutique of various styles and pieces all personally picked and bought to be sold in-store.

Opportunities just kept pouring out in handfuls, but the one aspect of Alice's life she couldn't seem to get a grasp on was her relationship with Max. Four years in and they were no closer to getting engaged than they were the second they met. With distance not in their favor, the couple occupied separate coasts for a long time due to opposing business ideas. Working hand in hand with Royce, Max would learn to build his own name in a world he wasn't so fortunate enough to be brought up in. Though it seemed that was all he was using Alice for. Finally secure enough in the brand he was making of himself, he continued to drift farther and farther away emotionally from his long term girlfriend. Deciding enough was enough and tired of living in a false sense of love, Alice called it quits in early fall of 2011 and closed the curtain on a four year courtship.

With time on her hands and a heart shut off from love for the time being, the carefree woman has turned her life into a mass chaos of extended play and limited sleep. She's trying to force herself into enjoying her single status, but fails miserably to appear unaffected when the rest of the world fades to the background and she's home alone for the night once more. Würzig, a fashion blog, was created to fill whatever downtime Alice has left. German for spicy, it's kept updated with her latest fashion cravings from personal photos of friends to random strangers she meets on the street. Maybe not happy, but she's as content as she's going to be, at least until she can figure out her next project.